Thanksgiving
I am not a mean or ungrateful person, and I love celebrations, but holidays and some of their traditions bring out the very vocal critic in me. On the morning after our national celebration of thanks, I'd like to have a good long rant!
1) As I rode south in the back seat of my mother's Subaru Forrester, (see #2) we passed amid the rape and pillage of the countryside where I grew up. Amid the open wounds of earth one can note that some of this land had been sacrificed for the very noble cause of...a Lexus dealership. It has pissed me off since I first spotted that snooty sign saying "future home of Lexus of Chester Springs". So as we passed I said " I just want to bomb that place! Bomb! Bomb! Bomb!" My mother was alarmed as her literal imagination had me torching the structure, being hauled off the the slammer and joining a prison gang. Then my Dad said of the new Catholic church across the street " I'd like to bomb their parking lot! Do you realize how much electricity all those lights use when they're left of all night long!" My mother was still concerned, but I explained that certain words really satisfy and put to rest our feelings of anger and powerlessness and bomb is a great one! Soon bombing things had become part of the vernacular of the journey.
2) The stupid back seat! Literally and figuratively! How do I hate it? Let me count the ways! When I ride in the back seat I feel second class, like I'm still a child living in a 31 year old body that really doesn't fit in that stupid seat. My long legs roam the empty wasteland for a comfortable resting place in vain. If I pay the slightest visual attention to anything inside the car I will be nauseous for the rest of the day. I have to do a gymnastic routine to get the hell out of that seat when we reach a destination. I'm either going to design a car with 3 front seats or hire someone to sit back there with me and keep me company!
3) The fate of the single on Thanksgiving is, I have always felt, to go wherever their parents go and act grateful that anyone is willing to have them at their table at all. I have realized that this is not so! I can actually do whatever I want! My favorite thanksgivings ever were as follows: a) The one at Emerson College in England where all the american students cooked the whole shebang for the rest of the college (from 31 different countries). My mother and sister were visiting at the time, but everyone else was related not by blood but by love, which carries none of the burdens of normal family. b) The one I spent by myself. This may seem pathetic, but I was in charge of the entire day, I cooked everything with care and joy (obviously I couldn't eat a whole turkey, so I made a chicken), listened to music while I worked, ate at my own pace and I thoroughly enjoyed it all. Next year I will be arranging something non-traditional and stupendous! Stay tuned!
Having got rid of all that crap, I must include the things that I am thankful for and indeed I am thankful for them every day.
I am surrounded by plenty and have never had to go without what was truly important, be it food, shelter, education or love. The family with which I felt resigned to spend the holiday is actually a welcoming, kind, interesting, and unique bunch of people and I know I could hardly do better! My parents and indeed my whole family are very open, accepting people and have never pressured me about how little money I make or my lack of significant other and it is only myself who is dissatisfied with these states. I am grateful to the universe for the opportunities it constantly places at my feet and for the exciting unknown that is my life in the future!
1) As I rode south in the back seat of my mother's Subaru Forrester, (see #2) we passed amid the rape and pillage of the countryside where I grew up. Amid the open wounds of earth one can note that some of this land had been sacrificed for the very noble cause of...a Lexus dealership. It has pissed me off since I first spotted that snooty sign saying "future home of Lexus of Chester Springs". So as we passed I said " I just want to bomb that place! Bomb! Bomb! Bomb!" My mother was alarmed as her literal imagination had me torching the structure, being hauled off the the slammer and joining a prison gang. Then my Dad said of the new Catholic church across the street " I'd like to bomb their parking lot! Do you realize how much electricity all those lights use when they're left of all night long!" My mother was still concerned, but I explained that certain words really satisfy and put to rest our feelings of anger and powerlessness and bomb is a great one! Soon bombing things had become part of the vernacular of the journey.
2) The stupid back seat! Literally and figuratively! How do I hate it? Let me count the ways! When I ride in the back seat I feel second class, like I'm still a child living in a 31 year old body that really doesn't fit in that stupid seat. My long legs roam the empty wasteland for a comfortable resting place in vain. If I pay the slightest visual attention to anything inside the car I will be nauseous for the rest of the day. I have to do a gymnastic routine to get the hell out of that seat when we reach a destination. I'm either going to design a car with 3 front seats or hire someone to sit back there with me and keep me company!
3) The fate of the single on Thanksgiving is, I have always felt, to go wherever their parents go and act grateful that anyone is willing to have them at their table at all. I have realized that this is not so! I can actually do whatever I want! My favorite thanksgivings ever were as follows: a) The one at Emerson College in England where all the american students cooked the whole shebang for the rest of the college (from 31 different countries). My mother and sister were visiting at the time, but everyone else was related not by blood but by love, which carries none of the burdens of normal family. b) The one I spent by myself. This may seem pathetic, but I was in charge of the entire day, I cooked everything with care and joy (obviously I couldn't eat a whole turkey, so I made a chicken), listened to music while I worked, ate at my own pace and I thoroughly enjoyed it all. Next year I will be arranging something non-traditional and stupendous! Stay tuned!
Having got rid of all that crap, I must include the things that I am thankful for and indeed I am thankful for them every day.
I am surrounded by plenty and have never had to go without what was truly important, be it food, shelter, education or love. The family with which I felt resigned to spend the holiday is actually a welcoming, kind, interesting, and unique bunch of people and I know I could hardly do better! My parents and indeed my whole family are very open, accepting people and have never pressured me about how little money I make or my lack of significant other and it is only myself who is dissatisfied with these states. I am grateful to the universe for the opportunities it constantly places at my feet and for the exciting unknown that is my life in the future!
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