The Princess and the Pea

I'd like to pretend I'm the kind of person for whom bliss is a primitive, secluded campsite with all my food hoisted into a tree to avoid the bears, but the truth is I am in heaven here at the KOA with a pool and free wireless internet! Here I am sitting at my picnic table in the cool mountain breeze, feeling like you are right here with me!
Mom called yesterday and ended our conversation by saying that cousin TR wanted to be sure I had been reminded about bears. Gwyneth then said it wasn't so much the bears as the mountain lions that worried her. So my drive through the majestic landscape of Wyoming was tinged with the nagging fear that I might become a meal for wildlife in my sleep tonight. I was just about to dig into my grandmother's emergency motel fund when I spotted the sign, and I knew that in my heart I am more of a kamper than a camper!
I think my neighbors are German; efficient tent assembly, tidy classic clothing and stern faces. Plus the woman seemed to be mailing an airmail letter.
Yesterday I drank delicious mint iced tea all day and when Gwyneth and AnnaMaria were passed out, I lay there in the dark, eyes wide with lingering caffeine and mind a-buzz with anti-bear strategies. So as many exciting opportunities as there are here at the KOA, I think it's Dairy Queen and early bed for me tonight! Oo! Maybe not! I just heard there's free ice cream at the camp store!